As a counselor I have face this conflict of standing on border of helping children to grow out of their mistakes and from school to at least have some consequences for non negotiable which some time had made me feel very uncomfortable, the latter part is always for a person with helping profession to do and moreover when this comes as expectation.
Recently I started talking about the productivity of the consequences we set for our children which somewhere gave me space to give our children a sense of responsible beings rather than just disciplined robots.
When I started doing that some of the members are taking it positively.
To start with constructive consequences one important thing about them is they are productive, like there should be some outcome of that and other is they should be meaningful. Some examples of theses are..
Assigning them a task. If you see students behaving in a way which is harmful for them and others. It’s better you assign them a task rather than just not making them a part of something.
Second is you can ask them to help, for adolescence specifically you can ask them to help any support staff or some kindergarten teacher in the class from which they get sense of how we start building something from this young age.
Engaging them in community service, as a school we have started giving them project of working in NGOs or teaching underprivileged.
Please note that these things might not work with children who have severe needs. But to develop civic sense and sensitivity towards self and other in our coming generation we can definitely try some of these constructive consequences.